do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize