So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
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I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
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Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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