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Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Don't EVER smell your tampon
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
