He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
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You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
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You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
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