Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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