First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize