I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
