So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
