So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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