Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
