I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
