I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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