toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
