R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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