My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
