Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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