i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
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mondays should just be called national damage control day
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
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After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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