Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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