so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
