I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
