I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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