you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
