my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I am available for nakedness
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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