your parents love me but you hate me
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize