you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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