do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Randomize
