On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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