only if we run a train.
done.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
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