Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
