your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
