if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
