I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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