So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
