I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
