she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
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Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
There's always time for handjobs
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
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