Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
there's paper in my vomit.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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