You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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