There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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