just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Randomize
