I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
