White coat. Heels.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize