It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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