be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
