Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
even my farts smell like vagina
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
