i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
