So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
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