I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
