Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
