Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
