The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
