Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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